This morning I started having another one of those days. My son, The Professor, departed for the driveway to catch his bus, only to return two minutes later yelling something about leaking. I pride myself on packing my kids waste-free lunches, which usually works out quite nicely...except for when I hastily screw on the top of the milk-filled Sigg bottle and don't notice that it's slightly crooked. My boy stood in the foyer with white liquid dripping from the corner of the messenger bag he uses for homework that overflows his regular backpack. Luckily last night was homework-free and he only managed to soak a binder he uses for his after school Classics Club. I ran to the laundry room with the messenger bag, leaving a wet trail behind me that was not surprisingly cleaned up by the cats a few seconds later. I managed to get to the kitchen, pull out a clean Built lunch bag, wipe down all the plastic containers, and get everything back into the lunch box before the bus came. Whew!
Well, sorta "whew". My kids basically tag-team in the morning, with The Professor going out the door just at the moment when I'm waking Foghorn up. I should say when I'm giving Foghorn the first of 47 wake-up calls. She sleeps completely rolled in a blanket from head to toe and I always feel like I'm peering into a sarcophagus when I approach her bed. As I was giving Foghorn call #3, I glanced out the window and noticed The Professor and the two kids across the street still standing in the driveway awaiting the bus. OK, not quite "whew." I threw on my shoes, grabbed my purse, and popped a piece of gum in my mouth. (The toothbrush and I hadn't had our rendezvous yet.) I yelled for the kids to jump in the van and that's when I noticed that the rear van window was down. That lovely, refreshing meditation in the park yesterday had resulted in a window accidentally being left down during a night of thunderstorms.
|Buddy in The Warden's taxi. He doesn't|
even tip well...
Ernest T. Bass on crack. I always feel a little guilty saying that my favorite moment of the day is when the bus door closes behind her, but today I feel totally justified.
There's gotta be some Ben & Jerry's hidden in that freezer somewhere. Hey, it's medicinal and has fewer side effects than heroin. What can I say? The silicon chip inside my head got switched to overload...
YOU MIGHT ALSO BE INTERESTED IN:
* Crime and Punishment
* Frenulectomy - The Final Chapter